All Posts tagged Teaching Boundaries

Sex Education Talk

If you are parenting a teenager, you are probably thinking of when would be the right time to have “the talk.” Well, the time starts when curiosity strikes in their toddler years! You don’t have to turn back time, but if you are a new parent you may want to start taking notes: it is never too early to start talking to your children about sex education, their bodies, and relationships. Consider sex education a broad subject, and not just an awkward talk about hormone-driven intimate moments.

Sex education includes talking with your children about anatomy, teaching them the proper names for their body parts as soon as they start making associations between items and words, educating them on how to take care of themselves and their bodily functions, and being by their side when they start being able to express their feelings and/or they start to understand themselves in relation to others; relationships and boundaries are also part of sex education. 

Early Exploration 

It is best to let your toddler set the time for questions regarding anatomy and sex, but you should also be aware of what questions may be opportunities for further discussions. For example, during bath time you can take the opportunity to talk with your child about their anatomy, and which parts of the body are private. Keep your answers short and simple, and age appropriate– if your child seems confused about something, don’t be embarrassed to explain further. You are, after all, the role model: the more maturely you approach the conversation, the more secure your child will feel about your knowledge. 

Curiosity 

It is not uncommon for toddlers to express their natural curiosity through self-stimulation. If you notice your child engaging with their genitals, it is advised to encourage their curiosity while also reminding them that some acts and areas of the body are private. This self exploration may coincide with curiosity about others, which can lead to uncomfortable social interactions. If your child asks about pregnancy or “where do babies come from” in front of others, it’s ok to take a moment in a social setting to explain some things to them. Should the question have made someone else uncomfortable, take the opportunity to apologize on behalf of your child, and model boundary-respectful behavior for them. It is also normal during this time for children to want to play doctor with their friends, and many families choose to monitor their children’s play time at this stage of their development, or set limits. 

New Knowledge

As much as you may try to be open with your child and monitor their knowledge of sex education matters, you should be aware that new knowledge always finds its way to young children. Unfortunately, new knowledge may not always come from reputable sources or be truthful and accurate. If your child asks you a question that seems off, or hasn’t been discussed in your household, the best course of action would be to ask them where they heard that, or try to locate the source of the information. Then, you could ask them to share what they already know about the topic and begin a conversation with them. It is important to let your child know you are comfortable with those questions, knowledgeable on the topics, and that they can trust you with their curiosity. 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/sexual-health/in-depth/sex-education/art-20044104 

https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/parents/tips-talking

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