Coming Out to your Doctor
If you belong in the LGBTQ community, you probably know that coming out is constant and not a “rip off the bandaid processm,” as it happens every time you meet someone new. Seeking a medical provider, and specifically an OBGYN, as a queer person can be challenging; if you already have a provider but have not discussed your sexual orientation or gender identity with them, it may be time to prepare for a coming out discussion.
Why does it matter?
It’s understandable you may want to avoid another discussion about your sexual orientation and/or gender identity, but when it comes to healthcare this is vital information so you can get the best possible healthcare. A queer ally doctor would be knowledgeable on the health risks a queer person faces. If you are seeing an OBGYN, being open with them about your sexual orientation is important in getting the care you deserve: proper exams and vaccinations, contraceptive methods (if needed), safe sex and risk factors education, and other preventative care. For example, if you are a lesbian couple trying to conceive, your OBGYN should be your strongest advocate in this process. If you are transitioning, your OBGYN should oversee your hormone intake and be there for you through your hormone replacement therapy, helping you remain healthy both physically and mentally.
How to Find a Queer-Friendly Provider
Whether you are considering coming out to your current doctor or looking for one, it’s good to look for queer friendly signs in a practice: you can inquire whether they have LGBTQ+ patients, or if there are doctors who focus on queer health and are more knowledgeable and experienced. You can also ask for referrals through your community: especially when it comes to finding an OBGYN, word of mouth and personal credibility go a long way. If you are nervous about your initial appointment you can ask a friend or trusted family member to come with you. Sometimes you can also authorize your partner or spouse to speak with your doctor on your behalf about certain matters–should you feel comfortable doing so–or be with you during the appointments.
What Should Providers Do?
Don’t think this should be a one-way street: not all falls on you when you want to ensure a practice is queer friendly. Providers can specifically showcase they are LGBTQ friendly, and a safe space, by doing some of the following:
- Displaying equality symbols in their office and/ or website
- Specifically stating they are knowledgeable about the LGBTQ community and are allies
- Have a visible non-discrimination statement
- Customize their patient intake forms to be appropriately inclusive
Meet the Standards of Practice: a set of recommendations created by the Massachusetts Department of Public Health to improve LGBTQ access to quality care
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