By Iris Farrou
24 Sep, 2023
Lifestyle Tips, Menopause, Mental Health, Peri-Menopause, Queer Health, Reproductive health, Sexual health, Women's Health
Anxiety, asexual, asexuality, assault, boyfriend, Buffalo NY, Depression, exhaustion, fear of intimacy, fiancé, girlfriend, how to be a supportive partner, how to bring up low sex drive, husband, intimacy fears, lack of intimacy, Low libido, low sex drive, medications that kill sex drive, meds, mental health interfere with sex drive, OB/GYN, OBGYN, overwhelmed, partner, PTSD, sexual trauma, talk to my doctor about low libido, what is a healthy sex life, why does my partner not want to have sex, why is my libido gone, wife
This may be a touchy subject for many women, as on the one hand a lot of us experience low sex drive, but on the other hand we don’t talk about it! The issue becomes more complicated when healthcare providers don’t even ask us about our libido, yet hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD) is quite a common issue women deal with. Additionally, many psychologists, primary healthcare providers and OBGYNs are trained to care for and treat HSDD. HSDD is defined as the absence of desire for sexual activity and/or sexual fantasies– we most often just refer to it as “low libido,” and like anything else, it can have its ebbs and flows. Lack of sex drive can be frustrating in a relationship, but it is a normal thing to be experiencing, it can be traced back to causes, and it doesn’t mean that it’s permanent or that you do not love or are attracted to your partner.
What Causes It?
Especially in women, low libido can be attributed to hormonal changes or imbalances: this can be during the menstrual cycle as estrogen and progesterone levels rise and lower, during menopause when our estrogen levels dramatically drop, in the case of a total hysterectomy, during pregnancy, or if you have PCOS–just to name a few examples.
Another common reason for low libido in women are mental health issues, as well as medications. Depression and anxiety, PTSD, and past sexual trauma can negatively affect a woman’s desire for sex. Many times, the medications used to treat mental health issues can worsen an already low libido. This does not mean an important medication should be stopped, but you can–and should–bring it up with your therapist or mental healthcare professional.
Life stressors, chronic stress, and fatigue can minimize the body’s natural sexual urges. This is even more prevalent in new mothers, or families with young kids: the everyday exhaustion, lack of sleep, and constant worry simply leave no room for sexual intimacy, or desire thereof.
What Can We Do?
If one partner has low or no interest in sex while in a healthy relationship, remember it is a team effort: it is not up to the partner who has low libido to “solve” the issue and magically become better.
- The first thing to consider and talk about, even if it’s uncomfortable, is relationship issues. Your partner’s desire for sex, or how safe they feel, may be affected by something in the relationship neither of you knew was an issue until you really examined it and talked about it.
- If you and/or your partner face mental health issues, it is important to carefully consider how those may be affecting your sex life. Especially if you take any medications, look into the side effects and talk with your therapists about how they could be affecting your sex drive, and solutions to balance that out.
- Redefine intimacy in ways that work for you, and where sex is not the goal or the starting point. You may plan a romantic date, do small daily things to lessen stress, or start with small affectionate gestures to help strengthen your romantic bond.
If you feel that your lack of interest in sex is related to a more serious health issue, either physical or mental, or to a serious issue in your relationship that you have not communicated about, it may be a good idea to seek out professional help and support. HSDD is not uncommon, and many medical professionals can assist you with it; you know your body and life circumstances best, and with a bit of assistance you will be able to get to the root of the issue much more effectively.
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By Iris Farrou
22 Jun, 2023
Childhood Health, Diet & Exercise, Fatherhood, New Moms, Parenting, Prevention, Toddler Health, Women's Health, Young adults & teens, Your baby's health
Anxiety, Baby, Boost Immunity, Child, food, Good Health, Immune System, Immunizations, Importance of, Pre-Teen, Probiotics, Sleep, Strengthen, Stress, Toddler, Vaccine, Vaccines, Vitamins, Wellbeing
The first concern every parent has when it comes to their child’s health is to keep them safe as much as possible. With extracurricular activities, summer camps, and attending school being a normal part of any child’s life, and going hand in hand with exposure to germs, it is often a challenge to help your children’s immune system stay strong. There are two routes that can assist you in this struggle: diet and lifestyle.
Before we talk about details on either path, there is one undeniable basis: make sure your children are up to date on important vaccines. For all people 6 months and older, the flu shot is recommended. COVID vaccines are now safe for younger ages as well–make sure all eligible family members are immunized, and keep checking with your pediatrician about being up to date on other necessary immunizations.
Diet and Supplements
In an ideal world, you have the time to prepare the best and healthiest meals for your family, and your children are never picky eaters. That would be a wonderful movie, but it is not the truth. Though pediatricians advise against using supplements and multivitamins to enrich your child’s diet–particularly because those are not well regulated in the US and their ingredients are not guaranteed–there are certain cases when supplements are needed.
Vitamin D is the first vitamin that helps children build a strong immune system; they usually would absorb it from the sun. However, if you do not live in a sunny area, there are certain kid-friendly foods that can help with that: fortified Vitamin D milk and yogurt, and orange juice. If you are lucky enough to be able to serve your child salmon, trout, tuna, and sardines then you are raising their chances of absorbing the necessary amount of Vitamin D. To use supplements, it is suggested that you first consult with your doctor and do a blood panel to see where your child’s Vitamin D levels are at, and what supplement is most appropriate for them.
Zinc is an important mineral that assists kids’ immune system. Oysters, red meat, and poultry are the best sources of zinc, followed by beans and nuts. If your child does not accept any of these foods, consult your pediatrician on how to proceed with a zinc supplement.
Probiotics and prebiotics play an important role in our immune system, specifically because they ensure good gut health. Probiotics ensure a good balance of helpful bacteria in our bodies, and in addition to yogurts you can try giving your child fermented foods–like pickles or miso–to help with that. Prebiotics also stimulate the growth of good bacteria, and they are mostly plant fibers: green bananas or plantains, yams, asparagus.
Lifestyle
Keep in mind that a healthy lifestyle is additional to a balanced diet when it comes to fortifying your child’s immune system. If you don’t have fruits and vegetables, as well as nuts and seeds in their diet, lifestyle changes can only do so much.
However, keep in mind that children need lots of sleep for their system to function properly and recharge. 12-16 hours for infants and around 10 hours for kids is what’s necessary to assist your kids in being healthy and help keep them on a regular schedule. Additionally, exercise and keeping active can do wonders for our immune system: encourage your child to be physically active at least one hour a day in some form of activity that they like; if they appreciate sports, so much the better! Physical activity doesn’t only contribute to overall good health, but it also helps manage stress. When we are stressed, especially in cases of heightened or chronic stress, our immune system is volatile and makes us more prone to infections. Be mindful of the stress levels your child may be facing, and encourage activities that make them happy and fulfilled.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/boosting-your-childs-immune-system-202110122614
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-boost-your-kids-immunity/
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